Haven’t really had an opportunity to sit down and write about what God has been doing inside my heart that has dramatically changed my life.
I had a very interesting year. Full of confusion, discouragement and worst of all I had developed bitterness towards the situations around me. One thing I can say is that I never doubted my God. He was always speaking to me in those times and though His voice was soft and simple it was all I needed to keep going. I found out a ton about myself. I revealed a lot of hidden sin that I didn’t know what to do with for such a long time. My heart had become numb. It had gotten so bad I didn’t even feel bad. I tell you all of this only to share with you what God did to me on a hot summer day in Keller, Texas.
I had heard from the Lord about two months before OE ended that He wanted me to leave Florida and do an internship at a church. So, I began my search to find a new home for the next couple of months. At the time, I was dating an amazing girl who was from the Dallas/Fort Worth area. Her mom had given me some contact information with some churches in the area and I took advantage of it. The list was about five different churches some big, some small. I had heard back from three, one wasn’t doing internships and the others were totally excited for me to come. Between the two churches in the time of deciding which one I was going to invest my summer in, there were a lot of differences. Most of you might know Gateway Church which has blown up the last five years or so. The other was (in the Texas world) a smaller church, Milestone. My options were big or small. Naturally you want big only because it seems like the most opportunity. I got on my knees and started to pray and the word I kept getting was “Keller…Keller…Keller…”
So, couple of weeks later here I was packed and ready to go with my brother in the passenger seat in my single cab truck headed for Milestone Church in Keller, Texas. Looking back and when I tell this story I realize how crazy I was kind of being. I knew nothing I was getting myself into. The Worship Pastor was bunking me with this guy who worked at the church who I didn’t even remember his name. I knew nothing about the church but the little bio on there website and the phone conversations I had with the Worship Pastor. I was going off a paragraph bio and my gut. I felt peace. I had never been so excited to go somewhere that I knew nothing about. I figured God got me this far, can’t back out now!
I arrived in the Milestone parking lot on a Tuesday afternoon around twelve o’clock, greeted by Worship Pastor Pat Brown. (Incredible man. He genuinely cares about people and there relationships with the Lord. Spoke a lot of truth into my life that summer and couldn’t thank him enough). I walked in the offices and was greeted then by everyone on staff including my new two roommates Blake and David, who had brought about six of there friends who I became to grow very close with over the summer. Well, what do you do in Texas? Eat. We left the church and went straight for Spring Creek BBQ. Mind. Blown. I had never seen or eaten anything like it. I thought to myself if I get anything out of this summer it will be the amount of amazing food I will consume while here. So far, so great! I had meet everyone I will be working with and was getting settled in at my new home.
Now, before I keep going let me back up just a tad. Before I had left for Texas, God had been showing me a lot about church outside of my norm Calvary Chapel. The girl I was dating started bring me to this church that meet on Friday nights called “The Harbor” . It was a charismatic church, which then I was so uncomfortable every time we went for the first month, and she knew it. Looking back I see what God was doing. He was preparing me for an encounter I would never forget and would change my life forever.
Back to Texas. I had my first Wednesday night at the church which was there youth group called “Elevate”. Blake, my roommate was the worship leader and graphic designer for not just the youth but the church as a whole. It was cool to see how they did it and how the kids responded. It was the summer so the number of students was lower than normal but they still had at least 200 kids there. When I talk to them now they have well over 300 and have set a goal for 500. Trust me, they will do it.
At this point I was really starting to connect with Blake and all of his friends. It was like I had been there for months. They accepted me right away and it was starting to feel like I was apart of something. I meet with Pat (worship pastor) every Tuesday morning just to talk and do discipleship. As much as I was really enjoying being there I was going through a lot. Seeing the way this church was run from the head pastor to the janitor there was something about it that I wanted. I needed. I was needing to hear from God on some things. I was confused why I couldn’t and why everyone else around me could. I believe Pat knew what I needed to do with Ocean’s Edge, but what he didn’t do was tell me. He wanted me to figure it out and make my own decision. We would meet and I would just beg him to just tell me what to do so I can stop stressing about it. I had the school calling me, breathing down my neck. I had a girlfriend who wanted me in Texas, I had a family that just wanted to know something and I had a God who was smiling. God knew I was going to make the right decision. Some argue was there even a right one? I believe there was a better one. Did I make the better one? I starting to believe so, but to be honest it wasn’t about that. It was about seeking God and His next step for me.
I had about 3 weeks left before I left…or stayed. It was coming down to decision time. It was a Tuesday morning (same day of the week I arrived at Milestone) and my spirit was heavy. We had started doing these prayer meetings for Elevate at Pastor Tyron’s house (youth pastor) all summer. Milestone believes in the gifts of the Holy Spirit. They believe in baptism of the Holy Spirit. They believe it is an act of faith to ask for your gifts and to act on them. I remember after Elevate one night Tyron wanted to pray for the kids because something felt off about the night and he felt the enemy was going to attack this summer. So, all the leaders and I went to the back room and just began to pray. Now, when you hear pray you hear “Alright, Jordan pray for us real quick.” When they said prayer, they meant it on a whole other level. I had never experienced anything like it. It wasn’t the fact they were praying it was the emotion behind it and the FAITH they put into it. We weren’t praying because God told us too. We prayed because we believed in what God can do. Come on somebody…
Sorry, I hope your keeping up.
Back to that Tuesday. I knew we were going to have our prayer group for Elevate that night and God had been working in me. I told Tyron that weekend I wanted to be baptized in the Holy Spirit Tuesday night. His response via text “ok”. I woke up that day and felt heavy, dark, like a cloud was over my head. I was being attacked, which meant I knew I was doing the right thing. It had been a day of phone calls and emails from the school, family, girlfriend, friends. All wondering the same thing. I was frustrated. I walked into the offices and went straight to see Tyron. I sat down and told him how weird I was feeling. He told me to take the day off and spend sometime with the Lord. I left and on my way home me and my mom were arguing about what I was going to do and little things that didn’t matter. I walked in my door and sat down. Phone rang, of course, but this time it was Tyron…”Come back up here. We gotta pray.” I knew it was the moment God had been preparing me for. The last two years of my life have been him shaping me and molding me for an encounter I would never forget.
Next thing you know its the two of us, at 3:30 in the afternoon, in a mothers nursing room, in Keller, Texas at Milestone church. He told me to tell him everything. Every sin, struggle, temptation I deal with in my heart. I let it all out. Told him everything. The list was a little longer than I intended but that was besides the point. The point was, honesty. When I had told him everything there was nothing to hide. He looked at me while pointing at the list and said “This is why you can’t hear from God.” I had never felt so small. So dirty. So sinful. He left the room and told me to pray for forgiveness. I prayed and prayer and prayed. Nothing. I couldn’t feel a thing. I didn’t feel bad of the sin, I didn’t feel any hurt. I just felt embarrassed and ashamed. He came back in and I told him “Nothing.” He said “Alright, repeat everything I say.” He went through the list one by one. I was pressing in so much to God, crying out to Him more than I ever have. he instilled this image in my head that moment. The image of me carrying this huge pallet of bricks. Each brick stood for my different sin and as we were praying the brick were flying off and exploding in the air. It was incredible. To this day, I still feel there is another level on brokenness I need to be at. There always is, but what happen then was the start of something that would not only change my life but the people I encounter in my walk with the Lord. I believe that.
He told me to stand up and to lift my hands in the air. He placed his hands on my head an began to pray a simple prayer with me. I told God that I believed He had more for me. He had gifts for me and that I wanted them right now. With my arms out to Him I prayed for the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. I prayed to receive whatever He had for me. I took that step of faith. I had been around it all summer and had experienced the fruit of it with my own eyes. I told God that He has a prayer language for me. Tyron told me to start trying to repeat what he was saying. He started praying in tongues and I tried my best to say what he was saying but something completely different came out. I had never felt the presence of God so much than that moment. The old heaviness was gone and a new one was placed upon me.
I left Texas a couple of weeks later, changed. When people doubted why I was going in the first place I just smiled and told them “God has something for me out there.” There will always be doubters. People who don’t understand or believe. I didn’t lead worship but one song that summer and I experienced God more than I ever have. I don’t tell you this story to freak you out. I don’t tell you to say “Hey, look what Jordan did.” I tell you because it shows the power of God. That the presence of God isn’t just a moment, its a walk of life. I didn’t tattoo “With Everything” on my chest because I like the song. Its a way of life. With Everything I had I moved to Texas. With Everything I had I revealed my sin. With Everything HE had, He came and rocked my world. There is more of Him out there and He wants you to experience it.
Hope this is more than just a story.
Jordan D. Colle